Finding Me.

I look back, WAY back to the girl before I became someones wife; to the time before I was someones mom.  Where did she go? How did she get lost? Who will help me find her again? Is it even possible to pull her back from the abyss of the past and into the present?  Surely I am not the only one on earth who has lost themselves by becoming everyone else's something, but in the process left me behind.  I know life changes people, circumstances change people, people change people, hardships change people, blessings change people, but into someone they don't recognize anymore when they look in the mirror and stare at their own reflection? These are all very introspective questions I have recently pondered, and maybe just maybe you have done the same.  I know we are meant to morph into the person God wants us to be, but what if some of that changing has left you so tattered and torn you just want to see a little of your old self come to life.

So much has happened in my life since the last time I wrote a blog, and honestly I don't know how long the fog will last being the crazy chaos that has been my life for almost two years now.  Divorce, moving to a different state, taking a new and very challenging job,  and on top of that being a single parent to two kids can take its toll.  No wonder I am tattered and torn, worn and wrinkled ;) But there is something deep within me that longs to see the girl I was, or at least pieces and parts of who I am, me as a person before the love, heartbreak, blessing, bliss, devastation and flat out train wreck that has been my life.

Were do you even begin to find the you that used to be? Do you look at old pictures or rekindle friendships?  Maybe do you wish you would wake up with amnesia and forget what happened? I don't know...well I do know that amnesia is not a viable option because although it would remove the hurt, it would also remove all the joy as well.  And about those old pictures...they don't change what has happened between then and now, but they will remind you that time marched on whether you like it or not.  Rekindle old friendships, absolutely, as there is nothing better than old friends to share good memories and new fun times with, and besides you could never have too many friends in this insane world we live in to share your life with.

What I do know is LIFE IS HARD.  Anyone who seems to have the perfect life is hiding something, maybe not on purpose but they are just in deep denial.  This world is filled with hardship, heartache, deep disappointments (some we bring apon ourselves, and some just happen) and no one is immune.  Bad things happen to good people, and life is not fair.  It's just fact, life is filled with thorns and some scratch deeper and sting more than others.  I often think how we deal with those scrapes, scratches, or deep and infected wounds become what molds us, shapes us, changes us, contorts us and not the bruises and bumps themselves.  After all, we can't remotely control the thorns that inflict the wounds, but we can control ourselves, how we handle them, and how we choose. And yes, choose to move forward in spite of them.  I am not the only one beat up, torn, contorted, wounded...we all are, just in different ways and severity.

That girl, the one I used to be, she doesn't exist anymore.  She is changed.  She is scarred.  She is broken.  She is often tired and weary.  But she still is! And she does not give up.  And she does not give in. And she does not look back and think what if...She looks forward, and thinks...what if?

Spring is HERE, what better than to try new recipes!!

Okay, I totally didn't realize how much I had missed the warm weather until spring arrived!! And even though I live in a state where sunshine isn't lacking during the winter months, it is still a breath of fresh air to feel warm breezes on my face.  Definitely a huge boost to my mood, and my motivation for getting things done is on the rise! Time to put away the furry fleece pajamas, and dig out the shorts and t-shirts! 

I spent the last several days cooking things for my family which I haven't cooked before at home.  And much to my delight along with theirs, most all of them have turned out better than expected! So after request from the Facebook friends and family, I will post the three recent recipes I am in love with, and happy cooking my friends!!

Layered Ratatouille

http://www.thecomfortofcooking.com/2010/08/layered-ratatouille.html

It was awesome!  If you have kids eating it, go easy on the pepper and red pepper so it won't be too spicy for your little's.  It is a great way to get veggies into your family, and it looks so pretty, who wouldn't want to eat it!!  Click on the link under the picture to the left get the recipe!

Cucumber Margarita

Second is the Cucumber Margarita I modified from a recipe I found on the internet.  The following makes one serving, so just adjust the ingredients according to how many you would like to make. 

2 1/2 oz. Tequilla (silver or 100% agave tequilla)

1 oz. light agave nectar

1 oz. fresh squeezed lime juice

2 oz Cucumber juice (or juice of choice)

place all ingredients in a stainless steel shaker with ice and serve in a salt rimmed glass of your choice.  I used a martini glass I painted in the picture. 

For the cucumber juice: Place the chopped cucumber in a blender (or I used my Ninja small single serving attachment) and smash the pieces down into the pitcher. Blend on high until liquefied, about 30 seconds. (You may need to stop the blender and smash the cucumber pieces down more to get the blade spinning again.) Then, set a fine-mesh strainer over a 2-cup measuring cup and pour the liquefied cucumber through the strainer. Using a rubber spatula, press on the solids to extract as much juice as possible.  You can also use this same technique to make other kinds of juice such as strawberry, raspberry, blueberry...you get the point. 

Bacon and Spinach Quiche

http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/paula-deen/spinach-and-bacon-quiche-recipe.html

This last one is just a bonus recipe for Bacon and Spinach Quiche, and it was amazing!! We told my picky little boy it was bacon pie, and he ate it like a champ! This one is a recipe by Paula Dean and it honestly was better than the quiche I have had in restaurants! YES, honest, so if you need to take a breakfast or brunch dish to something, take this and you will be BOSS of the whole shebang!! Click on link under the picture to the left to get this holy wow recipe!! 

Richard Sherman & John Tortorella (maybe it's a North West Coast thing)

Well, we can sure say this past weekend of sporting events were anything but boring.  And although I don't think I often, or ever for that matter, have given my two cents worth on sporting events or the "Pro's" in the sporting world; but I guess there is a first time for everything EH? NFL's Seattle Seahawks player Richard Sherman and NHL's Vancouver Canucks coach John Tortorella in the NWC (my acronym for North West Coast) surely need to invest in a sun light or something to help reduce their testy attitudes and keep them out of trouble!

Geeze, where do I start?  Who made a bigger donkey's batootie of themselves over the weekend is a loaded question? But what I find most interesting is the underlying information we probably don't know and didn't see that fueled the fire of these two.  From what I have read, Richard Sherman and Michael Crabtree allegedly had a run in off season.  This is Mr. Sherman's excuse for acting like a real doorknob when he had the undivided attention of millions of people...not exactly a wise usage of his twenty seconds in the spotlight (not to mention I would think it may have diminished his opportunities for additional income from sponsorships).  I know, I know, he was pumped with adrenaline.  So was I when I gave birth to my son at 38 years old without so much as a Tylenol, but I didn't run through the halls of the hospital afterward telling all the other Mom's I was the BEST!!! And for the love of Pete, he has his BA in Communication!  The poor little chick interviewing him looked like a deer in headlights and didn't really know how to handle an interview like the one he shouted.  And I know, he grew up in a bad part of Los Angeles, but if you are getting paid the big bucks and have a 3.9 GPA at Sanford, you might want to show a little bit of class...just sayin'!

Now on to John Tortorella who lost his temper after the Calgary Flames started their game with their forth line, AKA the fighters, and left John to decide whether to play his fighters too for the very first face off of the game, or risk his first line of superstars and hope the fighters didn't really want to drop the gloves on the very first shift of the game.  He decided not to risk the big dollar players and as soon as that puck hit the ice all hell broke loose!  Not how, I am certain, he envisioned his team beginning their game on Hockey Day in Canada 2014!  There is a part of me who can understand his lividness, since he probably thinks of his players a bit like his kids and wants to protect them a bit from silly publicity stunts pulled by a team like the Flames who are having a not so pretty season.  But his trying to get to the other teams locker room during the first intermission was a line he should not have crossed no matter how mad he was.  Not only that, but holy cow, he would have been destroyed by a number of Calgary's fighters had they jumped in to defend their coach!  That's like walking into prison and trying to take on Bubba before breakfast! And John is the coach of a team doing quite well this year, he makes tons of money, and is supposed to be their leader.  Gotta keep it in check when you are the coach, and in situations such as these, it is extremely hard to do, or not do in John's case (yikes)~!

What point am I driving at here you might be asking, and why is a stay at home mom writing about these two guys?  First, it shows us what NOT to do even if we don't make millions playing ball or coaching.  Don't waste your twenty seconds of fame bragging on yourself because it doesn't go over well, and when you are a leader of anything from your kids girl scout troop to the coach of the company ball  team...be just that, a leader AKA someone worth following when it matters most! Now here's my advice for both Richard and John, get yourself a little sunshine fix and smarten up!!! And as for me, I will just be glad none of my "finest moments" have been captured on camera to be played over and over on ESPN highlights or Youtube.  And for that reason alone today, I will smile and just move on ;)

New Year, never fear...or something along those lines :)

New Year's Eve 2013 has come and gone...Thanksgiving and Christmas 2013 but a memory now.  Am I the only one who is happy and sad all at the same time?  Life is so strange when you think about it.  As kids we feel like life and holiday's take forever to get here, and it is for the most part by far the easiest part of our lives, but of course we don't know that at the time and refuse to listen when adults try to tell us so as kids. As adults, life goes so fast, holiday's come and go with such a hurry you feel like a run away train with the brakes snapped in half.  And of course, as adults we don't want it to hurry, but rather stopping time or at least slow motion would be our preference!

So you may be wondering where I went to again? Even as I told my mom I was writing a blog today, and she said, "WHAT?"...I went on to explain why I think I am an on and off again blogger. First let me say, I don't make money at this, and I write because of the love of writing...plain and simple.  I am not someone who just likes to hear herself speak, and I don't necessarily desire to be in the spotlight.  I came to a realization today, I am like a well when it comes to writing...you know like a water well.  When I haven't written in a while the water builds up within the well, and once it begins to overflow so does my desire to write to the point where I almost can't stop it from spilling over.  Kind of like a burst pipe which can lay quiet for a while functioning to perfection and all of the sudden for no apparent reason there is a crack with a little leak, then a spurt sprays out...and before you know it, a full blown flood of water is released.  I know, it is weird, and I don't necessary think it is writers block because I can always force something out, but it is never my best work.  My best work is always a part of that overflow that can't be stopped because it comes from deep within me.  It is raw, transparent, uninhibited, and often writes itself if truth be told.  My fingers can't keep up with my mind, and this is probably the fastest my mind ever works...only to pause long enough to reword things which don't make sense or could be said better a different way.  Like I said, I know it sounds strange, and well, it is even to me, but this is the truth!

With all that said, in a nutshell I write because I can't stop it, and I can't control when it comes and goes.  It has a mind of it's own, just like my naturally curly hair does on humid days :) I don't want to be like the school teacher from Charlie Brown that drones on WAA wa wa waaa waaaaaaaaaa and no one listens.  I don't want to write just to hear myself speak.  I want to make sure what I do write has a little value, could maybe make a difference to someone, can fulfill my need to be creative by using the old noggin, and maybe, just maybe entertain a friend or two with my often crazy life so they don't feel alone!!


But hey, it's a new year, 2014, whether we like it or not, so bring on the new wrinkles, the fight to at least NOT gain any more weight this year, and hope for the best in the way of finances, overall health, the things that mean the most to us.   So, never fear people, as fear only holds us back from what we often do best but are afraid to fail at the most.  Cheers to 2014! We might as well since we can't stop time, so smile and just move on :)

 

Parenting...Most Important, yet Most Difficult!!

If there is one thing for certain in life...being a parent is by far the most difficult task we are challenged with in my opinion.  And not only is it the most difficult, but it is also the single most important job in the world without pay and no guaranteed return on investment.  I would laugh, but to tell you the truth, it is just not funny because it is so important and stressful from the time they are born until well...you die.  Not to sound so morbid on my first blog in a month, but I have been knee deep in parenting, and holy WOW...it is nonstop, high speed, no breaks, and stress to the nth degree!

But hey, at least I know for a fact I am not alone.  The problems are often vastly different depending on age and the issues at hand.  Difficulty of the parenting problems often slide on a scale of slight irritation to OMG I might as well toss myself off the bridge!  What I have determined is we, as parents, are all in the thick of it everyday, but the severity rolls up and down like a roller coaster without that final air brake sound which signifies the ride is over.  Sometimes it is fun, and we are laughing like a wild hyena with a huge smile on our faces...then a few short seconds later we are screaming at the top of our lungs in fear, horror and dismay as we free fall down the steepest hill only to go back up another and then WHOOSH, down again before even the chance to catch our breath!  Oh, you already know it, parenting...we love our kids to death, and want to ship them off to boarding school all within the same hour!!!  And what about self doubt, regrets and the famous line, "if only I'd have known..."?

We all face different "stuff" for lack of better terms as parents.  Some endure physical limitations for their children which can entail a lifetime of special care around the clock.  Other parents travel down the path of learning or processing disorders, autistic spectrum, mental illness, emotional distress due to abuse or trauma of some sort and the list could go on and on.  Then we have the more common issues like attitude, sassy mouth, defiance, promiscuity, alcohol or drug usage, threatening to run away, which can heap on top of some of the above mentioned issues.  You get the point, parenting is SO difficult, we have no manual with clear cut do this if...or don't do this if...or press reset should X,Y or Z happens... We constantly are second guessing every decision we make from which daycare center to what college, and a whole mess of every day fly by the seat of your pants decisions we make off the cuff.  Why in the world did we get into this parenting business in the first place?

WE LOVE OUR KIDS!!! I suppose if we didn't love them so much we wouldn't care if we were doing it correctly or not.  Love, the positive four letter word, not the ones we mumble under our breath when things don't go quite as we had planned it as a parent.  We all make mistakes as parents, our parents did, we will, and our kids will one day make mistakes as parents of our grand kids!!! Parenting a newborn who doesn't sleep and screams 24/7 leaves you feeling helpless, but so does parenting a teenager who can't see the boy she throws herself all over has no respect for her, and the parent who watches their adult son throw his career and family aside due to addiction.  Parenting never gets easier is what I have decided...only different! What else can you do once you have taken the plunge and become a parent? You can't give them back or walk away...parental hearts don't work that way.  We love them, support them, train them as best we know how, pray really REALLY hard, then smile and just move on :)

Struggling with Struggling :(

Please tell me I am not the only one who struggles with struggling? I know that sounds silly, but it's so true! The more I struggle, the more I stress about the fact that I'm struggling...thus creating a vicious circle of day in, day out internal conflict within myself.  I like to be the do all, be all, help all kind of gal, but often here lately I find myself wanting keep up or to do so much more, yet falling short in all categories.  I try to be content, I want to be content, I long to be content in all things...but yet I still struggle! I struggle with motivation, feelings of self doubt, and purpose; but this is where in the problem lies.  Is it the self doubt what causes the lack of motivation and thus lack of purpose? Could it be depression that causes lack of motivation and leads to self doubt and no purpose? I can admit, I don't have the answer :( But I can assure you, if you have these same struggles you are not alone.  I have headache issues which last for days and weeks on end which simply compound my struggles even further :(

What I have found to be true in my own life is I do well for a while, then either circumstances or often the great unknown causes me to fall into a funk.  I am not sure how else to put words to how I feel.  I know there are more people with WAY bigger problems than myself, and yet I still struggle.  Then I feel guilty for struggling, and it just slides down hill from there.  I have friends who are battling cancer, troubled teenagers, divorce, financial strife, the list goes on and on...which makes me feel even worse about my struggles over little of nothing in the grand scheme of things.  I can honestly say there isn't much I want or need beyond what I am already fortunate enough to already have.  I have a wonderful family, a beautiful home, a husband who is an amazing provider and allows me to be a stay at home Mom for our kids, and yet some days I just feel blah!  WHY??? Is it because I can? Am I putting too much emphasis on the what if of external things, instead of just enjoying this time of just being?  Is it possible I am so content I just don't recognize it as such? When do we draw the line of feeling a sense of accomplishment verses trying to be more and more?  Lots of questions to which I honestly don't have the answers to today.  How come I can't just crawl into bed satisfied with what I did today, instead of feeling the weight of what I didn't do?  I just hope I'm not alone on all of this...Could it be the pressures of society to do it, be it, live it all the time 24/7?

I am wondering if I should just try focusing on what positives I accomplished each day, as opposed to what I didn't do, and feed upon the good it might just turn my struggles into triumph?!  My crazy friend I love told me today she has been holding her own "Smile-a-thon" several times a day.  She read if you force yourself to smile, and I mean smile hard till your cheeks hurt for 2 minutes, it will cause your mood to switch by releasing endorphins leaving you in a more positive/happy state of mind.  She contends she ends up laughing at the end of it every single time.  Worth a try I suppose.  I told her I don't need to do the "smile-a-thon" thing because I get to talk to her and everyone in my family knows if I am on the phone and laughing out loud I am talking to her.  She is my laugh-a-thon, and for her I am grateful!!! I think she is giving the term "Smile and Just Move On" a new meaning with her "Smile-a-thon's"!!! Let's all give it a try, and instead of looking down at ourselves for what we didn't get done, just smile away at what we did get done today...stop the struggling because we are struggling!!!  oxox to y'all!!!

Are you still that girl or boy?

I don't know about you, but when I was a girl I thought I was going to change the world.  I wasn't sure how, or with what for that matter, but I was going to make a difference.  Then life has a way of sucking all of that positive energy and ambition right out of you like a powerful vacuum.  Things happen, life happens, bad things happen which we don't understand or deserve, and all of the sudden we just feel blah, and life takes the wind out of our sails.  When we are young and innocent life seems so exciting, and then we  become adults and we change :( Does it really have to be that way?

I have recently realized the answer is no, but it is merely a conscientious choice to still strive to not just be, but be all you can be; and what a different those two are in life.  It is easy to just be...live a life of complacency, a life of just going through the motions each day.  But what if, just what if we lived as an adult with the mentality we had as a kid to be so much more, to make a difference by not letting the hardship of life taint our spirit of tenacity?  After all, as the song above states, we are still that girl or boy deep down inside.  We just allowed life to steer us off track.  Instead of living a life of wishing, wanting, desiring more...why not do all you can to make your dreams and aspirations come true?  Will it take a little research, work, and persistence?  You bet ya it will! But won't it be worth it? You already know it!!! And keep in mind everyone's dreams and desires could be the same or completely different.  Don't impose your dreams onto someone else, and in turn they shouldn't try to change yours.  I believe we are all born for a distinct purpose, in a specific time and place, and we live life feeling unfulfilled because we simply settle.  Thus we feel incomplete, insignificant, and defeated while life marches on.  I don't know about you, but I want to have no regrets as I breathe my last breath.  I want to feel like I fulfilled my purpose, made my mark as I was destined to do, and well to be honest, wasn't lazy or too scared to try!  Does this mean I will succeed?  Not necessarily, but at least I will be able to say I tried.  And at that point, I will be able to smile and just move on knowing I didn't just settle :)

Love Must Believe You Are Worth It

We live in a society where we are constantly either measured by others and their standards, or we are measuring ourselves to standards which are unrealistic and often unattainable. We often find ourselves wishing we could be someone else, rather than just being content with who we are and how God made us.  In other words, we struggle with loving ourselves.  We are all guilty in some shape or fashion...whether it be physically, intellectually, emotionally, financially or any other attribute which we may be falling short in comparison to those we know personally or those we only see on the big screen or television.  WHY? Why do we sell ourselves short, and struggle with loving ourselves for who we are just as we are.  We all have shortcomings; and we all have faults...yes even those we want to be more like or wish we were.  We are all special in our own way, and loved by those around us...but most importantly by a loving Father in heaven.

But this drives me to my next thought, which might just come across once again controversial, but you know me and that's just how I roll.  I may not be right, but it is a possibility even if people don't want to admit it to themselves.  I wonder as we have just celebrated Easter, which embodies the death, burial, and most importantly the Resurrection of Jesus Christ, that those who choose not to believe in God or Jesus just can't fathom that someone could possibly love them that much to die for them? And I can admit, it is often very difficult for me to understand and comprehend.  I would die for my family, but total strangers...I don't know :/  Or is it the idea that there is something greater which we can't see, touch, smell or hear; and yet is beginning and end, has the ability to control everything we can and can't, or is it simply a lack of self worth?  I realize I may take some heat from this, but I just felt like I would throw it out there.  It's hard to believe God can still love the killer, love the rapist, love the druggie, love the abuser, love the thief, love the pedophile, or love the sinner like me.  We all are sinners, we all make mistakes...some of us a little or a lot bigger than others; but sin is sin in the eyes of God.  But yet He still thinks we are worth it! And how do I know?  I believe He allowed His Son, the Son of God, to be crucified for my sins, your sins, and every one's sins or wrongdoings from the beginning of time till the last person breathes their last breath! Now this is where the REAL love comes into play, so let me explain a little further.

You know how bad you feel when you do something you know you shouldn't have done...or lets say think of the worst thing, or top ten bad mistakes you have ever done wrong in your life which not only hurt you but those around you.  Now, I will go out on a limb and assume most of us haven't done much in the way of killing, abusing kids, or some of the other top sins when we categorize them, but many many people have over the course of the last however many thousands of years.  Now tally up as best you can all sins, big or small from EVERYONE who has ever lived so far...now add those who are yet to live with their sins big or small.  Now remember how you felt just reliving your worst sins and how you felt completely heartbroken and hurt, disappointed and completely consumed with self-loathing over your sin.  NOW think how it must have felt for Jesus to take on not just the pain of the physical death itself on a cross after all of the beatings, but to take on the emotional distraughtness of every ones sins from the beginning of time until the end of time!!! Basically incomprehensible to the human mind how that must have felt.  Now...THAT IS LOVE!  And He obviously thought you were worth it! He, Jesus Christ, the Son of God, felt your pain, your sorrow, your unworthiness, and took it on to pay your debt! There is no greater love which will ever be displayed, EVER!  Now go look in the mirror and tell yourself, you are worth it, you are loved, and just as you are.  Stop comparing yourself to others, love yourself...then Smile and just move on because you are worth loving...imperfections and all!

April Fools? Who are you fooling?

Today is April 1st, otherwise known as April fools day!  And after a bit of research on how April fools day began...there are way too differing stories and who knows which, if any, is correct.  I suppose I won't even try to do there today.  Besides I am way too preoccupied with trying to potty train my son! It can be said, I suppose that he played an April fools joke on me without even meaning to do so today.

Yesterday after waiting MONTHS to have him do a #2 on the potty, and after much bribing him with everything from toys, to money, to motorized vehicles...it finally happened.  Needless to say, my daughter, husband and myself acted like complete lunatics once the deed was complete...insane clapping, cheering and over the top positive reinforcement was our plan to keep him motivated to use the potty!!! And as I had promised, after I picked him up from preschool this morning, we proceeded to the Walmart to purchase the firetruck he had been eyeballing for a while.  This firetruck was all he had talked about for weeks now.  The firetruck was purchased, and all was going well today.  He even wore his big boy underpants to school, and after three hours had successfully kept them clean and dry.

We get home, and I run upstairs to make the beds and throw a load of laundry in the wash. As I walk down the hall, I notice the puppy seems to have left his mark on my carpet.  I then get the little green out to treat the pee pee spot on the carpet, put it away and walk downstairs where Luke is happily playing with his new firetruck...with a big old turd in his underpants!!! April fools on me, right?  I bought the firetruck to hold up my promise, and it wasn't even 1/2 hour old, and I was cleaning out his pants.  I wasn't sure if I should laugh, cry or throw up my hands in frustration.  But I suppose parenting can be that way can't it?  We turn our backs for two seconds and all can fall apart!  Of course, did what all frustrated parents would do...threaten to take the firetruck back because he pooped his pants.  Will it work?  Who knows, a girl can hope!  I don't think a day would be complete if I didn't deal with vomit, pee or poop from either my kids or animals.  One day when all is quiet in my house, you know when I'm a hundred and ten years old, and I will remember these days filled with bodily functions of all sorts.  These years are the best and yet the messy ones as well.  What else is there to do but smile and just move on...as they say "poop happens" :)  

Recipe Wednesday...1 Pot Meal Roast Beef and Smashed Potatoes

Pot Roast with Smashed Potatoes

Thanks www.dashrecipes.com for this awesome dinner recipe!! This is a very similar recipe to one we have had in my family passed down.  I love the idea of cooking the meat and potatoes all in one pot, because I love to cook, I love to eat, and I so do NOT love dishes!!! By the way, Dash has some great recipes, so check them out sometime ;) Oh, and one more very important detail, I love the gravy on the potatoes too!!!

Ingredients:

2 Tbsp vegetable or olive oil

1 3½ lb chuck roast

1 medium onion, halved and cut into ¼-inch slices

5 cloves garlic, peeled and smashed slightly

2 lbs small Yukon gold potatoes, scrubbed

2 packets onion soup mix

½ tsp black pepper

2 10¾ oz cans cream of mushroom soup

1 14.5 oz can low sodium beef broth  

½ cup sour cream

 

Directions:

1. If using a Dutch oven, preheat oven to 325°F. In the Dutch oven, heat oil over medium high. Brown the meat, 5 to 7 minutes per side. Add onions; cook for 5 more minutes. Add the garlic; cook for another minute.   

 

2. If using a slow cooker, transfer the meat and onion mixture to it. Add remaining ingredients except sour cream. Cover and set cooker on low heat setting. If using a Dutch oven for the entire time, cover and place in the oven.  

 

3. Cook 4 and a half hours. Remove Dutch oven from oven or turn off the slow cooker. Remove meat; rest on cutting board.

 

4. With a slotted spoon, remove potatoes to a bowl. Add sour cream; smash with a wooden spoon or potato masher. Season with salt and pepper, if desired. And if they are a bit too stiff, you can always add a little splash of milk to thin them a bit.  

5. Slice beef; serve with broth on top and potatoes in a bowl

 

Bad Habits...So hard to break!

Tonight, I thought as I twirled my hair, tickled my hair in my ear and bit the skin on the inside of my jaw...I would tackle a subject which often gets little attention, bad habits. Now, let is all be honest with ourselves, we all have them.  Some are a little more dangerous to our health, some are harmless...but they are all things we wish we didn't do, but can't seem to help ourselves.  I notice as my stress level goes up, my habits increase as well.  Funny thing is, my husband and I have the same habit of shoving the end of our hair under our finger nails.  It gives that sensory input I suppose we need to help soothe our nerves.  If I am super stressed, it might be said I am doing a double twirl, or the double tickle with my hair in my ears.  I know, it's strange...but don't judge.  You know you have those habits too which you can't seem to break.  I have a family member, whom I will leave nameless, that pulls their eyebrow hairs out one at a time until there are virtually any left.  And of course, you have the common ones like biting fingernails, picking your nose, cracking or popping your knuckles and chewing on a pen or pencil.  But why is it so stinking hard to stop this often crazy and bizarre behavior?

If you think about it, I bet you are like me and have had the same habits basically all of your life.  My Mom would tell you when I was a baby, still in my crib, I would pluck the fur off of my stuffed animals and tickle with them.  I guess back then, when I didn't have any hair, I had to sacrifice the fluff off of my stuffed animals...I know pretty funny.  It's okay, you can laugh at me.  I don't care, partly because I am confident in who I am, mostly because the Lord is the One I most worry about impressing, and I know I'm not alone :) But what is the reason we struggle to break them?

Often it is simply a decision to just not give it up at all. Or if you are like me, I just choose to keep the ones which are more harmless than the others.  My husband gives me trouble for biting my jaw, and yes it probably causes me extra unwanted wrinkles on my face...my Mom would tell me it was going to cause cancer, yet the only way I can stop it is if I have a mouth guard in place to prohibit me from biting.  I do it without even realizing it, almost like a compulsive disorder.  I don't really want to do it, it just happens like when I blink my eyes or swallow.  It is hard to stop something you don't even realize you are doing until it is too late.  Then the hair twirling, and tickling are often the habits I can use instead of biting my jaw to soothe myself from stress.  At least they don't cause wrinkles or "cancer" as my Mom would threaten when biting my jaw.  Neither here nor there, habits are hard to break, like it or not.  They are mechanisms which we have acquired to help us cope with the stresses of life.  So the next time you see me twirling my hair, tickling or shoving my hair under my nails...Smile and just move on :) 'Cause chances are, I will be playing with my hair until either I am dead or have no hair which ever comes first!!!

Oh, and one more thing, feel free to tell the world your bad habits in the comments section if you'd like :)

And the Winner Is...

After drawing a name out of a hat from the entries for the digital scrap booking software, and I promise I did it fair and square...Jaclyn Anderson is the winner :) but never fear, I get to give another package away for free in 3 months, so make sure to enter to win again :) have a great weekend everyone!!!

Oh Spring, Wherefore Art Thou?

Oh spring, where are you?  I am so tired of cold weather, and I'm not even in a part of the world that is all "that" cold in comparison.  Mother Nature, didn't you glance at your calendar lately...It is March 22nd, come on with it already!!! And of course, I am NOT ready to wilt with the summer heat either, just want those beautiful spring days with a temperature about 75 degrees, nice breeze, and bright blue sky with big white puffy clouds.  Seriously, is that too much to ask?  I think not.  It took this winter to kick into gear, and now I guess we are paying the price for those nice days in late November!  It didn't even feel like Christmas this year because it was so mild, and now Spring doesn't feel like itself because IT IS COLD!!! I need my flip flops, my t-shirt, my smells of spring.  Now, I realize it is on it's way courtesy of the POLLEN count, and it is doing quite the number on my allergies.  And I assume I am not the lone ranger on this one either.

I have purchased so much Sudafed lately the police are probably going to show up at my door and accuse me of drug manufacturing, LOL! And I am not the only one in my house suffering.  My kids are too, so when I go to the pharmacy to purchase their pseudoephedrine, I have to give them my drivers license number.  Then I go to buy mine, and they tell me I am at my limit!  Go figure, do I look like a meth producer? I think NOT!  But I suppose I understand the why behind it, however if people are determined to make that poison, the law is probably not going to stop them unfortunately.  I get up each morning, can't breath out of my nose, and so my mouth is dry and tastes like the cats litter box, or what I imagine it probably taste like :) I try blowing, and blowing, and blowing as my sinuses crackle like a piece of dry wood thrown on the fire. I cough and feel like I have an elephant taking up residency on my chest, as my allergy induced asthma rears it's ugly head.  My Mom likes to compare it to breathing through a towel, and all of the sudden breathing is something you actually notice taking place, where it once was just naturally occurring without you thinking about it at all.  I take my allergy pills like clockwork, yet as the pine trees do their thing, my poor little immune system goes into overdrive and I feel like someone drained my energy right out of my big toes.  Tis the season, I just wish it was actually accompanied by nice weather this year.  If I'm gonna suffer, might as well be with mild temps!!

I am sure I am not alone in dreaming of springlike temperatures, allergy season slipping by without my body noticing the pollen counts are on the rise, and moving closer to boating, golfing, swimming, and enjoying a casual drink on my deck season.  But, it is just a part of life and we will all have to be patient whether we want to or not.  Mother Nature doesn't really care about my opinion on her timing, so I guess I will smile and just move on :) It can't last forever, right?

Oh, and one last thing, today is your last chance to enter the digital software give-away for scrapbooking with your digital pictures at www.mymemories.com.  You must enter your name on the post from this past Monday in the comment section by 5pm TODAY!! Right now only four people are signed up, so they have pretty good odds, unless you, yes you, get on the ball and enter!  I will take all entries and in a very high-tech way (not) write their names on little pieces of paper, then draw one out of the hat!  Announcing the winner at 7PM tonight :)

21 of my Favorite Things on this 21st of March :)

I should preface this list is just that, things, and are in a very random order, and by no means listed from least to best or vice versa, and excludes people!  Here goes...and how many of mine are on your list too?  Write your name and how many of your fav's are on my list, just for fun of course!!!

1. Clean sheets
2. A new toothbrush
3. Puppy breath
4. A new box of Crayola Crayons
5. Pink Lemonade Cake
6. Hearing the words, "I love you"
7. A unexpected gift or flowers
8. Sun on my face, and sand on my feet
9. The morning I leave for vacation
10. Good music
11. Waking up to inches of snow on the ground
12. Comfy shoes 
13. Wearing my pajamas all day
14. Biscuits and gravy 
15. Double rainbow after a storm
16. Taking a nap just because you can
17. Answered prayers
18. New haircut 
19. Brownie Sundae
20. Wind in my face on a boat ride
21. Getting a hug just when you need it most

It's Recipe Wednesday, back in action...

Recipe Wednesday, the day I designed to post a new recipe, or an old recipe I just ran across again.  Geeze, life is complicated, full of distractions and craziness, but I think I am back on track with this blog :)  Also, I will be launching a Smile and Just Move On Facebook page so make sure you LIKE and share with your friends, PLEASE (in a pretty please with sugar on top kind of voice)!! Also, don't forget to sign up to win the digital scrapbooking software which will be given away THIS FRIDAY to one lucky winner.  Leave your name in the comments of yesterdays post to be entered.  Remember, this could be given away as a gift if you didn't need it yourself.  See previous post for information...

 So, spring is here and what better to kick off spring, but a SPRING SALAD!!! Enjoy peeps :)

Ingredients 

12 slices bacon

• 2 heads fresh broccoli, florets only
• 1 cup chopped celery
• 1/2 cup chopped green onions
• 1 cup seedless green grapes
• 1 cup seedless red grapes

• 1/2 cup raisins
• 1/2 cup blanched slivered almonds
• 1 cup mayonnaise
• 1 tablespoon white wine vinegar
• 1/4 cup white sugar

1. Place bacon in a large, deep skillet. Cook over medium high heat until evenly brown. Drain, crumble and set aside.
2. In a large salad bowl, toss together the bacon, broccoli, celery, green onions, green grapes, red grapes, raisins and almonds.
3. Whisk together the mayonnaise, vinegar and sugar. Pour dressing over salad and toss to coat. Refrigerate until ready to serve.

Let's try this again, Scrapbook software give away FREE

Okay, so I tried this before and had two wonderful people comment to be entered into the drawing for free software. And not to discount the efforts of these two fine ladies, but two people just don't feel like a contest to me...  Are y'all telling me only two people out of all of you that read this blog like to get something for FREE?? I don't buy it!! I decided maybe I didn't explain it very well, or made the entering too hard?  I would like to give it another go, and I already have the free code for the software stored on my computer and ready to GIVE FREE to someone!!! So, come on people, could you at least make it a little more exciting to give away 40.00 worth of digital software from My Memories PLEASE.  And keep in mind, I am the one who chooses the winner, not the company. You don't have to do anything with them or give them any information unless you are chosen the winner.

First, you will want to check out their site to see if you are interested.  Keep in mind, if you really get into this, you can purchase additional designs, but the original software includes tons of different designs, colors, fonts, and the list goes on and on.  It is easy to use, and you can choose to print your stuff, or just keep it digitally and show people that way too!  The website is http://www.mymemories.com/ so go check it out real quickly and then comment on this blog your name (first and last) and why you would like to win.  Don't be lazy and turn down this opportunity to help simplify your photo keepsakes.

I have shown you two pages from my book I am making (slowly I might add, due to major sickness and allergy attacks that have hit my home lately).  It never hurts to try winning now does it?  Remember, it is FREE!!! I love free stuff, who doesn't?  Go for it, comment below to enter the contest! Only one lucky winner, and for the love of Pete, let the contest consist of more than TWO people.  I know you all take pictures with your camera, or if you are like me, most are with my phone.  They are all just sitting there waiting to make something beautiful, right?  Just do it!!! NOW!!! sign up!!! and if you win you will be smiling, and if not you can always take advantage of my coupon code out to the right to get 10.00 off the software and 10.00 coupon to spend in the on-line store for extra designs if you want them.  Go for it!!!

A New Appreciation for Living

Funny how when life moves along and nothing major is going on, we kind of sail along and don't think too much about it.  This is when all of the sudden the little things seem huge, and we often get bogged down with worry and stress over "stuff" that in the long run really doesn't matter much.  Why can't we just be glad all is well, and not search high and low for something to complain about?  Of course, this is not my case, as most often something is going on at my house, but then again with a busy husband, two kids, two dogs, and a cat...someone is always causing a ruckus. Either the cat coughed up a hairball, the dog peed on the carpet, my son is shooting snot rockets out his nose, my daughter is late for dinner again, my husband has run out of gas somewhere...you get the point.  Never a dull moment or peace and quiet, that is for certain.  Wonder what it's like to be able to go "potty" by yourself, drink a Coke without having to share, shower at a leisurely pace, or just take a walk without having dogs and kids tagging along?

I have noticed the older people get, the more they worry about things which are small and to be quite honest have no major significance on life in general.  Not that my list above doesn't list things which are smallish, but it is the constant barrage of them coming at you 24/7 which wear you down. .  For instance, once we have retired, have the house and cars paid for, have the children out of the house and on their own, to me...this is a time to kick back and enjoy. But, I believe all the silly worrying is probably because they truly don't have much else to worry with, so in an effort to complain about something...they look for things.  No mortgage to pay, no homework to struggle through, less laundry, less food to prepare, less of everything really.  Why do we as humans find ourselves constantly ill-satisfied no matter how much we have and how easy life is.

Movie stars and the rich and famous are prime examples of this too.  They have every material thing possible at their fingertips, but yet they are often wrapped up in drugs or some other detrimental activities which often land them in deep trouble or even death.  It is so very sad really, and quite a shame.  Instead of celebrating how good we have it, we look to all the negatives in our lives.  Is it merely human nature, or a direct result of the society we live in?  Maybe the cause is unrealistic lifestyles we see exhibited on television or movies?  Most of you, if not all of you who are reading this, are privileged!  You must have a computer, or access to one at least, which means you probably have a house, food, clean water, and all the daily necessities to function...which is more than millions of people in this world right now.  We have much to be thankful for today.  We must renew our appreciation for life, and don't worry with the small stuff going wrong, but harness the sense gratitude toward what we do have.  Life is too short, and we only have one shot at it...don't waste a single moment with negative "stuff".

My puppy, Levi, was very near death just a week and a half ago.  Now, as he lays on a cushy fluffy doggie bed on my office floor with a full belly, I feel certain if he could speak...He would let me know he has a new appreciation for life and all it has to offer.  Don't make life bring you toward death to have appreciation for all life has in store for you.  And when things do happen, big or small, smile and just move on...

The Waiting Room

It is amazing when you stop to think about how often we find ourselves in a waiting room of one kind or another. I wonder how many years of our lives we spend waiting? Maybe in a doctors office or hospital, a line at Wal-Mart or Starbucks, McDonald's drive-thru or airport security, stop light, lunch line, concert line, traffic jam...you get the point! We do a ton of waiting, some of us patiently, and others...well not so much! I always get tickled when the people with the least likely reason to be impatient, are often the most impatient of all.

For instance, I can be standing in line at the grocery store with my phone ringing with a business call, juggling a screaming toddler, and running late for an appointment with a smile and kind words for the cashier; and the old retired lady behind me who has got the sour look on her face, tapping her foot, and has nowhere to go, but get home to watch the Price is Right and pet her cat :)

Let's face it, life is about waiting. We wait to grow up, wait to get married, wait to have kids, wait to retire, wait to have grandkids, then wait to die.  It's just what we do, wait.  But not always patiently, and waiting is often not easy.  I know, I have been there first hand and more than once on BIG issues.  I have been forced to figure out how to wait with a spirit of endurance and patience toward whatever I may be waiting for.  Over the last week, just in case you were wondering or hadn't seen on FB, my new puppy has been very sick and very near death.  Talk about the need for endurance and patience...waiting for the doctors to give me the update, waiting to see if he will improve, waiting to see just how big the vet bill will be...WAITING to pick him up from the hospital so he can be back in my arms.  In the last month or two, I have waited to see if I was buying a house, having a baby, if my husband was having surgery on his Achilles, and waiting to see if my puppy is going to live. That my friends is a lot of waiting on some very important stuff in a very short time frame.  But I had to wait, and it is better for those around me if I remain calm and ride out the waves with a sense of endurance and confidence knowing God is in control.  If not, I would probably have lost my mind.

Life has a way of testing us, our ability to sustain hardship, waiting, and wondering what next?  And in the end, we have two choices really.  We can either let our life and waiting ruin our day, our mood, our relationships with those around us.  Or, we can choose to roll with the punches, take things out of our control in stride, and realize sometimes life just is what it is, things just happen, and we must keep on a going.  Worrying seldom changes a single thing, and often makes us irritable, unhappy, and upset to the point of being sick.  Don't let life and it's trials drag you down, wait patiently, maybe even with a smile, try not to worry, and when life gets really crazy, pray...then smile and just move on :)

And one more thing, my sweet puppy Levi made it through and I need to throw a benefit dinner to pay for his enormous vet bill.  But he is back home barking at the cat, chewing my husbands croc, and sleeping on my couch during the day and snuggled up to me in bed at night :) Patience and perseverance paid off on this one!! Thanks Quail Corner Animal Hospital in Raleigh, NC for saving my sweet furbaby!!

Digital Scrapbooking Software Giveaway

It has been my pleasure to conduct a review of the My Memories suite over the last month, and I would like to share with you my thoughts...followed by the rules for the giveaway, so you can enter to win a completely free  My Memories Scrapbooking Software once the contest ends on Feb. 25th :) Check out their website to see exactly what coolness you have the opportunity to win for FREE!!!

I don't know if you are like me, but my pictures from the last 20 years are in complete disarray.  I have all of my printed, pre-digital pictures in a plastic three drawer tote thingie.  Then all of my digital pictures were in file folders with little rhyme or reason to them.  As I began with this software it was my incentive to get organized enough to begin a project for my husband for Valentine's Day.  I went through my pictures in the tote, pulled out all of those I wanted to incorporate into my project, and began scanning them in.  I also browsed through my digital pics to find just the ones I needed for the surprise book.  I found this to be the hard part of the project, finding and deciding on which pictures to use.  The software was quite easy to work with, and felt it was similar to other popular software in how it works.  PC or Mac users can utilize this wonderful software with ease.  Below you can see a few pages I created for my first project, and I can assure you...it was nice to finally put my pics into something other than a plastic tote!

The software can be as unique to you, or you can choose to use one of the already pre-created templates (which is what I decided to use for my first venture)!  Even if you choose the templates, you can still change the background colors, where the pictures are located, and the wording is whatever you choose!  It is truly a great way to create not only picture albums, but also video movies set to your specific music, unique personalized gifts, and digital or printed books.  It is truly a great way to create one of a kind gifts for others, or even yourself!  My Memories has a ton of Youtube video's to help should you need additional help with using their products, which is very helpful! So, lets move on to the rules of this FREE giveaway, and maybe you will be the winner of this awesome software, and then you can begin your projects for everyone to enjoy! Please be sure to read the rules thoroughly, so you don't forget part of your required answers to enter the contest!





The rules of this giveaway are as follows...And your answers need to be left with your name, first and last, in the comments section attached to this specific blog post.
1. You will need to visit www.mymemories.com website and choose your favorite theme or designer.
2.  Explain the state of your pictures right now, and how this software would help you maintain your pictures and projects.
3. Tell everyone what kind of project you would work on first,and why. (Don't forget your NAME :)
Like them on Facebook for an extra entry into the contest at MyMemories Facebook!


The winner will be announced on February 25, 2013 on the blog post for the day.  Good luck to everyone :) I wish I could give everyone a free copy because it is truly a wonderful product.  But if you are not the winner, I highly recommend you purchase the software.  It is very reasonably priced to begin with, but if you use my code of STMMMS81275 you will receive $10.00 off the price of the software plus a $10 coupon for the MyMemories.com store - a $20 value!  

Let the contest begin!!!

It's Valentine's Day!!! Cook up some easy, yummy, and healthy Salmon!

The big lovie, kissie, huggie, smooching day is finally here!  The day loved and hated by millions all around the world.  Restaurants will be packed, along with card and flower isles in grocery stores all across the country.  But might I suggest if eating out is either too costly or logistically difficult due to kids and schedules...you try this oven baked salmon for a nice and healthy treat for those you love :)  I can honestly say I made this for my family on Monday night, completely made it up...but it was a WOW for everyone at the table, and even surprised me too!  I am sure it could be cooked differently with about the same outcome, but I will tell you exactly what I did just to be sure I don't cause lack of information to ruin your special dinner plans.  Best news of all, it was quite easy, and the ingredients are probably all in your spice drawer other than a few.  Nothing worse than trying a new recipe and having to hunt all over the store for specific ingredients that end up only being used once!  I should have taken a picture of the salmon, but it was eaten up quite quickly and I am sorry to say, no picture of it exists.  But if you make it, take a picture, so I can post it here with the recipe.  You can email it to me at julietannamcdonald@gmail.com. Salmon can be served with rice, mashed potatoes, or baked potatoes...and the veggies of your choice :)

So, Happy Valentine's Day to everyone out there, and look for the contest and give away for the first product to begin tomorrow:)

Baked Buttery and Dill Salmon
 by Julie McDonald

Deboned Salmon fillets with skin on the bottom (I got 6oz serving sized fillets, one for each person)
1/2 stick of melted butter
1/4 to 1/2 tsp onion salt
pinch of pepper
1/4 tsp Cajun spice
1/2 to 1 tsp Rinaldo's organic Garlic Gold Nuggets (these are also great on fresh sliced tomatoes)
package of fresh Dill Weed (not the dried kind) it will be in the produce section probably hanging up in a small clear container

• Rinse and pat salmon dry and place in an aluminum foil lined baking dish with a little bit of olive oil in the bottom (I used a Pampered Chef baking stone) with the skin side down.
• Drizzle 3/4 of the melted butter on salmon
• Sprinkle with onion salt, pepper, cajun spice, and garlic nuggets
• Lay washed fresh dill weed sprigs on top of each piece of salmon
• Cover with aluminum foil and bake in preheated oven at 350 degrees for 15 minutes.
• Uncover and place back in oven at 380 degrees for an additional 10-15 minutes until salmon is flaky when touched with fork and looks light pink (do not over cook, and keep in mind it will continue to cook a bit more once removed from the oven)
• Snip remaining dill weed foliage (no stems) into remaining melted butter, stir up and dollop on top of salmon once served onto plate.  Butter may have thickened, but will remelt on warm salmon with no problem

We all decided this should be a once a week meal for the family as getting in the Omega's is challenging, and this is quick and the clean up is so easy, just remove the foil, throw away the skin and rinse, then recycle that foil please!!!